the heidi chronicles
Thursday, April 08, 2004
very little to report from lately from my world. i have settled quickly, but happily into my new relationship. i have barely spent a night not in the comfort of his arms... cute as a trainwreck, huh?
things that could cause conflict that are up to occur.... tomorrow i must publicly break the news that i am leaving turner by mid-summer to return to the land of bread and puppets. i am happy about this move, as the corporate world has proven to indeed, not agree with me. however, i feel a bit guilty that i am wasting all of the time and effort that was spent training me, etc. but alas, a girl must learn that she should never sacrifice her own happiness. i have made that very mistake one too many times already in my life.
ok, maybe just that one thing seemed big enough. well, and then there's a big family gathering for easter. this should be interesting... i am unsure (and too lazy to check, honestly) if i have mentioned my cousin britnay before. she's 14? 15? no older than just-turned-15... and ran away from her rehab program back in like october. yep - she's one of those. i love her, but am truly over it at this point. the kid has issues, and they are issues that have not been handled properly because my family is all about the DENIAL.... but i remember when i was 14, 15. i remember that i my conscience was fully intact and no matter how much anger there was inside me and how bad i might want to lash out at one particular person, i was always aware that it might hurt others who didn't deserve it and could use my better judgment. i am rambling. she generally treats people like shit, and i have no more sympathy for her. well, she has returned from her little hiatus from reality, so it'll be interesting to see how that affects the family dynamic. it almost seemed like it was pleasant while she was gone. so bad of me... i think i am just worried about how to react personally. we were once very close, and now i am so angry at her that i am afraid of what i will say... i don't want to hurt anyone else (like her mother) by being awful to her, but i am not going to pretend that i am just happy she is home, either.
poor simon. he gets to meet my family during all this.
mental to-do list: start drinking water like i should again; write in this thing more; plan next vacation; look into a new gym (must tone tummy and thighs); clean apartment; get photo album for scotland pictures; look at prop list for simon's film; decide if i should invite boyfriend on memorial day vacation romp or make it an all-me weekend.... hmmmm
by the way, if anyone wants a gander at the place that has stolen my heart from england:
http://pak02.pictures.aol.com/NASApp/ygp/GuestLogin?event=DirectView&shareInfo=esv4e%2b9w77mippuj%2bRtzt%2b3Afp6qsPgzdFK5zfoz70S%2fjFCnkV3ciA%3d%3d&pageName=AlbumViewFromEmails&locale=en_US
http://pak02.pictures.aol.com/NASApp/ygp/GuestLogin?event=DirectView&shareInfo=esv4e%2b9w77nvp5WMUI5msbvE5KsszauFodl81PrLLZC%2fjFCnkV3ciA%3d%3d&pageName=AlbumViewFromEmails&locale=en_US
http://pak02.pictures.aol.com/NASApp/ygp/GuestLogin?event=DirectView&shareInfo=esv4e%2b9w77l%2bhs%2fjJbFvZPpx7NhGHGiBW3ggwoFONci%2fjFCnkV3ciA%3d%3d&pageName=AlbumViewFromEmails&locale=en_US
http://pak02.pictures.aol.com/NASApp/ygp/GuestLogin?event=DirectView&shareInfo=esv4e%2b9w77kPA7rcfKoVGrvE5KsszauFD1UKwlWVZs6%2fjFCnkV3ciA%3d%3d&pageName=AlbumViewFromEmails&locale=en_US
here are a few of them....
things that could cause conflict that are up to occur.... tomorrow i must publicly break the news that i am leaving turner by mid-summer to return to the land of bread and puppets. i am happy about this move, as the corporate world has proven to indeed, not agree with me. however, i feel a bit guilty that i am wasting all of the time and effort that was spent training me, etc. but alas, a girl must learn that she should never sacrifice her own happiness. i have made that very mistake one too many times already in my life.
ok, maybe just that one thing seemed big enough. well, and then there's a big family gathering for easter. this should be interesting... i am unsure (and too lazy to check, honestly) if i have mentioned my cousin britnay before. she's 14? 15? no older than just-turned-15... and ran away from her rehab program back in like october. yep - she's one of those. i love her, but am truly over it at this point. the kid has issues, and they are issues that have not been handled properly because my family is all about the DENIAL.... but i remember when i was 14, 15. i remember that i my conscience was fully intact and no matter how much anger there was inside me and how bad i might want to lash out at one particular person, i was always aware that it might hurt others who didn't deserve it and could use my better judgment. i am rambling. she generally treats people like shit, and i have no more sympathy for her. well, she has returned from her little hiatus from reality, so it'll be interesting to see how that affects the family dynamic. it almost seemed like it was pleasant while she was gone. so bad of me... i think i am just worried about how to react personally. we were once very close, and now i am so angry at her that i am afraid of what i will say... i don't want to hurt anyone else (like her mother) by being awful to her, but i am not going to pretend that i am just happy she is home, either.
poor simon. he gets to meet my family during all this.
mental to-do list: start drinking water like i should again; write in this thing more; plan next vacation; look into a new gym (must tone tummy and thighs); clean apartment; get photo album for scotland pictures; look at prop list for simon's film; decide if i should invite boyfriend on memorial day vacation romp or make it an all-me weekend.... hmmmm
by the way, if anyone wants a gander at the place that has stolen my heart from england:
http://pak02.pictures.aol.com/NASApp/ygp/GuestLogin?event=DirectView&shareInfo=esv4e%2b9w77mippuj%2bRtzt%2b3Afp6qsPgzdFK5zfoz70S%2fjFCnkV3ciA%3d%3d&pageName=AlbumViewFromEmails&locale=en_US
http://pak02.pictures.aol.com/NASApp/ygp/GuestLogin?event=DirectView&shareInfo=esv4e%2b9w77nvp5WMUI5msbvE5KsszauFodl81PrLLZC%2fjFCnkV3ciA%3d%3d&pageName=AlbumViewFromEmails&locale=en_US
http://pak02.pictures.aol.com/NASApp/ygp/GuestLogin?event=DirectView&shareInfo=esv4e%2b9w77l%2bhs%2fjJbFvZPpx7NhGHGiBW3ggwoFONci%2fjFCnkV3ciA%3d%3d&pageName=AlbumViewFromEmails&locale=en_US
http://pak02.pictures.aol.com/NASApp/ygp/GuestLogin?event=DirectView&shareInfo=esv4e%2b9w77kPA7rcfKoVGrvE5KsszauFD1UKwlWVZs6%2fjFCnkV3ciA%3d%3d&pageName=AlbumViewFromEmails&locale=en_US
here are a few of them....
Wednesday, April 07, 2004
Thursday, April 01, 2004
how appropriate... i took the country quiz...
You're Ireland!
Mystical and rain-soaked, you remain mysterious to many people, and this
makes you intriguing. You also like a good night at the pub, though many are just as
worried that you will blow up the pub as drink your beverage of choice. You're good
with words, remarkably lucky, and know and enjoy at least fifteen ways of eating a potato.
You really don't like snakes.
Take the Country Quiz at
the Blue Pyramid
a very short list of things that i love:
the smell of fresh cut grass
the smellof burning matches or a campfire
cadbury dairy milk chocolate
the part in "beautiful day" by u2 where the edge hits that high note
a deep midnight blue
my best friends - i would list them, but i will inevitably leave out someone vital by accident
my roomate's dog, dillon
getting texts from said roomate that say "love ya, whore"
having the two greatest parents on earth
the new remix of "english summer rain" - esp. when brian sings "i can't sleep without your breathing"
scotland
the way simon looks at me right before and right after he kisses me
the way simon kisses me - there is NO comparison, NO competition
dancing to anything rene will play
the hematite choker i bought the day i saw scott ian of anthrax
GEORGE HARRISON
all things keith haring, esp the picture now permanently inked on my body
TAZO passion tea w/ tons of honey
vanilla anything (esp. vodka)
key lime martinis
key lime pie
having my hair played with/brushed/washed
the taste of simon's lips
jeff buckley's voice
almodovar films
Lost in Translation
being a size 12 again
my "niece" chloe
when i know the answer to the music questions at trivia before the host is finished asking them
"15 minutes old" by snow patrol, "maps" by the yeah yeah yeahs, "happy" by the wrens
the lyric "you pour yourself over me like the sun through the blinds"
did i mention dancing?
good theatre
being a part of good theatre
when simon approaches me from behind, sweeps my hair to the side, and plants a gentle kiss just below my neckline
the way his head tilts back and his eyes close when i wash his hair
spending money on people i love
roadtrips
being an only child, but having christopher as my surrogate brother
having lexie as my surrogate sister, even if she is on the other side of the country
that i went to vegas and never gambled once
shoes with chunky, luggy heels and soles
the cover photograph on "Sleeping with Ghosts"
plain hoop earrings
the city at night
singing to the radio as i drive
singing to the radio as i drive, with simon's hand resting on my knee or the back of my neck
sleeping in
hearing songs in my dreams
love
the smell of fresh cut grass
the smellof burning matches or a campfire
cadbury dairy milk chocolate
the part in "beautiful day" by u2 where the edge hits that high note
a deep midnight blue
my best friends - i would list them, but i will inevitably leave out someone vital by accident
my roomate's dog, dillon
getting texts from said roomate that say "love ya, whore"
having the two greatest parents on earth
the new remix of "english summer rain" - esp. when brian sings "i can't sleep without your breathing"
scotland
the way simon looks at me right before and right after he kisses me
the way simon kisses me - there is NO comparison, NO competition
dancing to anything rene will play
the hematite choker i bought the day i saw scott ian of anthrax
GEORGE HARRISON
all things keith haring, esp the picture now permanently inked on my body
TAZO passion tea w/ tons of honey
vanilla anything (esp. vodka)
key lime martinis
key lime pie
having my hair played with/brushed/washed
the taste of simon's lips
jeff buckley's voice
almodovar films
Lost in Translation
being a size 12 again
my "niece" chloe
when i know the answer to the music questions at trivia before the host is finished asking them
"15 minutes old" by snow patrol, "maps" by the yeah yeah yeahs, "happy" by the wrens
the lyric "you pour yourself over me like the sun through the blinds"
did i mention dancing?
good theatre
being a part of good theatre
when simon approaches me from behind, sweeps my hair to the side, and plants a gentle kiss just below my neckline
the way his head tilts back and his eyes close when i wash his hair
spending money on people i love
roadtrips
being an only child, but having christopher as my surrogate brother
having lexie as my surrogate sister, even if she is on the other side of the country
that i went to vegas and never gambled once
shoes with chunky, luggy heels and soles
the cover photograph on "Sleeping with Ghosts"
plain hoop earrings
the city at night
singing to the radio as i drive
singing to the radio as i drive, with simon's hand resting on my knee or the back of my neck
sleeping in
hearing songs in my dreams
love